3 Things that I have learned from living in different cities around The World.

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I have just relocated to Miami and I have been asked by many people, what my favorite city is. I haven’t been able to answer this question because right now, of course I will say, Miami. However, I would not be being true to all the lessons and blessings I have received along the way.

God, people and places have been good to me and I can’t just brush that off. I have had the fortune of living in 3 different countries and residing in 5 different big cities. And for that, I will always be grateful.

Here are 3 Things that I have learned from living in different cities in The World:

1. We get what we need when we need it.

A few months ago when I decided to leave Los Angeles, I felt sad about it. A part of me regretted even moving there from New York because what people had told me Los Angeles was, I had come to see for myself. I saw a lot of superficial people, transactional relationships and a scene that depends on who you know or date. This is so not me.

Then I remembered when I first moved to Los Angeles, I felt a sense of safety there. I could do tons of yoga, hike and soak in the sun. I have had to remind myself that just because it was short-lived, it doesn’t mean that I should regret it. It served its purpose, even if it was only four years. California gave so much to me and I will always hold it dearly in my heart.

2. Life is about moving forward.

I spent most of my twenties in New York City, hustling and bustling. And as someone who is nostalgic and sentimental, I have memories that take me right back to walking down Broadway or taking the bus down Empire Boulevard past Eastern Parkway during The Fall. Remembering smells and scents that take me back ten years ago can feel painful sometimes.

During the lockdowns, I fell into a depression and sometimes it was hard to see any light but I kept my hope. Focusing on being present daily helped me immensely. It put into perspective that while (sometimes the past) seems enticing, it is over and done. I have today to make the most of and I am grateful.

3. Live like you can’t go back.

After having lived in different places, sometimes I catch myself saying that I should’ve done something that I really wanted to in a particular city or place that I didn’t. I’ve had to remind myself that I can’t go back but moving forward, I will live life to the fullest.

Moving forward, I will say yes to that date, I will take that adventurous trip and, I will connect with as many people as possible.

I promise to live life like if I couldn’t go back, I wouldn’t change anything- as much as I can.

3 Things that I wish I’d known about anger before I became an adult.

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I have spent a lot of time being angry. In retrospect, who knows if it was warranted or not; however, I do know that most of my anger was a waste of my time. I’m not saying that being angry isn’t natural; however, I am also saying that the mindset of someone who is angry is limited because when we are angry, our focus is like a bull with a red target and we forget to appreciate what is around us. 

Over the years, I have learnt how to calmly my anger down or acknowledge it and then move forward from it. 
Here are 3 things I wish I’d known about anger before I became an adult: 

1. Don’t let anger get in the way of your future. 

My teenage years and early twenties were spent being angry and full of rage. Even though, for the most part, I perceived myself to be happy and put well together, I had a lot of inner anger. Now that I have grown, I can sum up being angry as a result of how I felt I was treated by men. In my mind, I was a victim and therefore I had a right to be angry at how men had treated me throughout my life. 

Little did I know is that all that anger was only hurting me. 8 years ago, I decided to leave my anger behind because I noticed how it was self-inflicted and stopping me from achieving anything valuable in my life. Once I released my anger, I noticed a big shift in my life. I went from being a perpetual victim to a victor and took a stand in the right direction towards healing and forgiveness. 

2. Anger triggers our bodies’ stress receptors. I am a yoga teacher and spiritual guide. What I have learnt in myself and others is that being angry releases stress receptors into our bodies and creates inflammation which internally has tremendous negative effects on our health.

One of the foundations of yoga is calming the body down to unify it with our mind and soul. I noticed that anger stopped me from unifying my body and took it out of its natural state: well-being. When we are at peace, our bodies can do what they are meant to do without being bombarded by fear and anger.

 3. The best way to have control is to be at peace about something. One of the most fundamental turning points of when I was in my twenties is when I decided to stop blaming men for the reason why my relationships had not been working out. You see, I had adopted the toxic female ideology that all men are bad and it created deep anger within me and it blocked any man coming into my life because I was convinced that all were bad.

So even if a good and wholesome man entered my life, I was stuck on being angry and dating men who triggered this emotion in me. After this moment of realization, I have had my angry moments yes! However, I can feel my anger arise and choose if I want to partake in it or not. Sometimes anger is useful but being angry all the time is not the direction of where I want my life to be in. I want to aim for peace and surrender so that I can leave situations knowing that there is only so much I can do and I leave the rest up to God. 

9 Ways to de-stress.

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We are in some pretty hectic times and although life can’t always be easy and smooth, we must remember that stress has a direct correlation to the increase of illnesses and deaths because it impacts our immune system. 

So, please make sure that you are taking steps to calm yourself so that your body can restore. Physical trauma can leave un-necessary wear and tear. 

Here are 9 ways to de-stress: 

1. Meditation. 

2. Light lavender candles. 

3. Place lavender droplets on your bed. 

4. Massage your body with lavender oil. 

5. Yin Yoga, great for restoration: joint and tissue relaxation. 

6. Burn some sage, lavender incense or palo santo. 

7. Breathwork. 

8. Journaling: write down who you forgive and what you you want to let go of. 

9. Pray. Surrender your stresses to The High Power.

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I forgive myself.

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Why do I want to forgive myself? 

Because now that I know better, I am doing better. 

I forgive myself because sometimes growth comes in the form of making mistakes and learning from them. 

I forgive myself because I refuse to be shackled to my low moments in life. I choose to vibrate higher and see the silver-lining in every situation, including the choices that I have made. 

I forgive myself because aiming for perfection isn’t helpful and doesn’t allow me to connect with others. 

I forgive myself because a lot of life is about getting back up again, even when we don’t think it’s possible. 

I forgive myself so that I can hold myself accountable today, tomorrow and in the future- without emotionally labelling myself. 

I forgive myself because mental and physical freedom is not free, sometimes I have to fight for it. 

What I wish I’d known about these 3 types of personalities.

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Life is a journey and we are dealt with cards that we can either use to advantage us or work against us. You might have heard this analogy often. But what does this mean? To me, it means that I will make the best of life no matter what is thrown at me. I will work hard, think smart and do what I can to be my best, regardless of where I have come from, the colour of my skin or being born a woman because my power is in my hands. 

Having this mindset has gotten me into a lot of hot water. I admit to not always being sensitive and compassionate in some areas- which I am working on. However, I have learnt that there are personality types that would rather whine than work, complain rather than correct and, defy true freedom rather than define it for themselves. 

I am learning more and more as I go and mostly, that you can’t help those who do not want to be helped. 

Here is more of what I wish I had known about these 3 types of personalities: 

1. Those who refuse to grow. 

Growth is optional and the older that I get, the more that I can clearly differentiate the difference between people who make an effort to evolve vs. those who stay stagnant. I was one of those people who felt like I could stay the same and that nothing would change me or my view on life. But, I quickly learnt that I would only hurt myself  if I was not open to seeing life from a different perspective. 

Refusing to grow works against the cycle of our lives. Just like trees shed leaves, we are meant to shed a part of our personality and acquire another. That is evolving. Understanding what works and what doesn’t. If we don’t evolve and figure out what isn’t working for us, we only hurt ourselves because we are recreating the same life, over and over and expecting different results. Which is a form of insanity. 

2. Those who blame what has happened to them on other people. 

A friend shared a quote on Instagram that said, ‘The World might be responsible for your pain but, you are responsible for your own healing.’ And, it resonated with me deeply. I recounted the amount of times that I had blamed things on being a woman, a person of colour or being raised in a developing country. Then, I remembered how good it felt to be empowered anyway.

Despite what my ancestors (regardless of heritage) had experienced, I am here today. That is proof that more is going right than not. The power is in using what I thought were my disadvantages as my advantages. I connect with people who feel isolated because I once did and I understand fully that isolation is sometimes external but is usually self-imposed. 

We can spend our time blaming or work to being whole and full of love. It might be unfair, yes! But, who loses if we don’t? Definitely not the person we blame, we do. 

3. People who will never be happy with me. 

I used to suffer deeply from the need to make people around me happy. When I became self-aware of this, I thought that it was to save the person that I wanted to make happy. However, I came to realize that it was to serve me and my Ego. 

You see, if I had to be around someone who wasn’t pleased with me, I felt badly because I wanted to appear like a good person. Over the past decade, I have been healing this part of myself. The side that wants to appear ‘good’ because I have learnt that if I am living truthfully, not everyone will be happy with me. 

I have had to learn that some people won’t like me, especially when I am not following the crowds and stand up for what is moral and in alignment with God’s word. It is not my job to be liked and releasing myself of the need to be held hostage by other people’s opinions is liberating. I might go through life never being understood by others but as long as I live a life that praises God, is ethically sound and health-orientated, I don’t have to look to others for acceptance. I can look within for all the embrace that I will ever need. 

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9 Affirmations to support unity.

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I am learning now, more than ever, that unity is a challenge to continuously maintain. Inside of ourselves as well as with others. Yoga has been my biggest teacher of Union because it has shown me that regardless of how my body and mind feel, I must accept it. Acknowledgement is the first step to unity. 

There will always be times of division, particularly externally based on un-necessary labels. Sometimes we forget that behind the person we have labeled, there is heart and soul. Which can never be broken or concealed. 

Here are 9 affirmations to support unity: 

1. I am whole. 

2. I do my best to hear others’ opinion without vilifying them. 

3. I am allowed to feel how I feel- as long as I am not hurting anyone, including myself. 

4. I am allowed to think how I think. As long as I am not hurting anyone, including myself. 

5. I am supported by the people in my life. 

6. I support the people in my life. 

7. I am the continual Observer. 

8. I can be right and wrong. If I am constantly the former or latter, I need to open my mind. 

9. I am a human-being in a sea of other human-beings who are united as people who live on the same earth. 

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12 Things that I want to give myself credit for (in 2019).

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Truthfully, I have felt some disappointment about a few people’s reaction to my honesty regarding what I’ve been through this year. After going through a lot, I noticed a lot of ‘positive gaslighting’ in forms of, ‘don’t worry, things get better’, ‘keep a positive approach’ or, ‘you can do it!’

I know that these phrases mean well; however, I have done the best that I can under these circumstances with the tools that have been given to me. So, hearing what I need to work on when I have poured my heart out, feels like a slap in the face.

I don’t think any of these people mean unwell; I just think that sometimes listening is better than always looking for a remedy. Sometimes, we are so quick to find a solution that we forget about compassion and kindness. There are times when listening is the highest form of love.

As a result of feeling this way, I decided to look within and give myself the credit that I have been looking for outside. Although it would be nice to receive credit from others; if I don’t give it to myself, there is no point in looking to others for it.

Here are 12 things that I want to give myself credit for (in 2019):

1. For leaving a toxic relationship with a healthy body and mind.

2. For getting up everyday.

3. For putting forward effort.

4. For trying to see a silver-lining in most situations.

5. For crying sometimes.

6. For smiling sometimes.

7. For listening to my intuition.

8. For never giving up.

9. For maintaining a healthy body.

10. For my (almost) daily yoga practice.

11. For starting a wellness platform.

12. For reminding myself of what I should be proud of.

What are you giving yourself credit for? Make a list and e-mail it to info@biologiquelife.com to be posted.

Lets celebrate life by being good to us

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Let's celebrate life by being good to us.                                                                                         By waking up grateful at the mere fact that you have learnt at least one more thing than you knew yesterday.

Let's celebrate life by being good to us.
By realizing that your perception of your day and life have an affect on the progression. For, the more we focus on the things that aren't there, we forget those that are.

Let's celebrate life by being good to us. 
By accepting that when someone is unkind to you, they are doing you a favour. You have the ability to strengthen, learn and grow- what a blessing!

Let's celebrate life by being good to us. 
By forgiving a situation that hurt you, you probably won't be hurt that way again. So why dwell on the hurting? When you have the perfect time to heal what has been hurt.

Let's celebrate life by being good to us.                                                                                       No one else has your name, your face and your body. Your skin is too beautiful to wear uncomfortably.

Let's celebrate life by being good to us.                                                                                         As we are our own Best Friends. who can treat you better than the person you spend the most time with? Yourself.